I think it is amazingly prescient that the folks at Nokia are going to start sending me new model cell phones to review, starting next month. There must have been a disturbance in the Van Allen Belt or something, because just before they contacted me, I had resolved to post a long and bitchy post about my most recent phone, a Sony Ericsson S710a.

I love the engineering of this phone. It looks great. It takes great pictures (except for the truly stupid shutter sound that cannot be turned off, although there are three more or less aggrevating versions of the shuttle sound -- I particularly hated this feature when shooting pictures at a school play featuring my younger son, recently) and that makes up for some of the negatives, but my problems with connectivity suggest a complete breakdown in product management by Sony Ericsson and Cingular, my carrier.

This is touted as an EDGE capable phone, and I am being charged the monthly fees that would -- in principle -- allow me to use the phone for email, web access, and so on, at EDGE speeds. And, of course. I would like to be able to use the phone as a modem, as I did with its predecessor, a Sony Erricsson T367. But all of that has been a failure, for months.

Yes, the bluetooth connectivity to and from my Mac works, as it did for the T367, so I am able to move photos and other stuff (like phone call recordings!) relatively easily fromt he phone. But theconnectivity stuiff just can't get set up. Why? It looks like Cingular caan't be bothered to figure out how its offerings actually work with the phones they are selling us.

Once you buy this phone from Cingular you have to go to the Sony Ericsson website to download the settings for email, for example. In my case -- perhaps because my phone number was ported from another carrier? -- I was being sent settings for SBC instead of Cingular. These did not work. And in the case of the EDGE settings, the Cingular people at my local store did not have the faintest idea how I should proceed, aside from directing me to call their tech support staff. I tried to call several times, but the wait was always too long for me. A tech support email to Sony Ericsson received a quick response, however, but directed me to a third party hobbyist's Mac modem settings, and two+ screenfulls of directions about what I needed to do to manually set my phone up. A close reading of that hobbyist's site suggests that I would have to do even more to get anything like EDGE speeds, though. I have yet to undertake that, partly because I would still need to garner necessary infromation from Cingular to make it work. I bet this would take several days of my time. Really. Look at the instructions:

[via email]

Dear Stowe Boyd,

Thank you for contacting Sony Ericsson Online Support.

The phone can support EDGE, however we do not supply the EDGE service. If you require certain scripts to access the EDGE network, you will need to download them.

If you are unable to access your email, by using the over the air configuration tool, you may need to contact your service provider to obtain the manuel email settings for your phone.

I have included the instructions below for inputting them into your phone.

If you are unable to set-up your e-mail using the OTA (Over the Air) configurator on www.sonyericsson.com or through your service provider, you can manually configure using the instructions below.

BEFORE YOU BEGIN, PLEASE MAKE SURE THAT YOU HAVE THE FOLLOWING:
- Internet account (A simple way of setting up an Internet account is to ask your service provider to send you a message that contains the required information to create an account automatically on your mobile phone)
- If you don·t have a Data account configured in your phone, please see the section, set-up a data connection, below. The additional settings needed from your service provider are listed in the section
- Service Provider/E-mail provider specific settings. Please see the section, Set-up E-mail, below
- Verify your ISP account offers POP3 or IMAP4 access.

DATA ACCOUNT AND EMAIL
Before you begin configuring e-mail, you need to have a data account. You can have several data accounts saved in your phone, with different settings for different purposes (for example, one for WAP and one for email). If you already have a data account in your phone, please go to the section, Set up email. If you don·t have a data account in your phone, please follow the instructions below.

SET-UP A DATA CONNECTION:
When manually setting up a Data Connection, you will need the following information from your ISP or GPRS provider:
- One of the following
* APN (Access Point Name) · For a GPRS / EDGE connection
* Access Phone Number · For a GSM connection
- User ID · The user name you use to connect to your account with the provider.
- User Password · The password you use to connect to your account with the provider.
1. [CONNECT] > [DATA COM] or [DATA COMMUNICATION] > [DATA ACCOUNTS] > [NEW ACCOUNT]
2. Highlight [EDGE DATA] or [GSM DATA], press "Select"
3. Enter the name that you want to associate with this connection and press "Continue"
4. Highlight the [APN] field (for a GPRS connection) or the [PHONE NO.] field (for a GSM connection), then press "Edit"; then fill in the information from your provider and press "OK".
5. Highlight [USER NAME], press "Edit"; then fill in the your User ID and press "OK".
6. Highlight [PASSWORD], press "Edit"; then fill in the your password and press "OK".
7. Press "Save" to complete your data connection set up.
NOTE: You can create and store several data connections in your phone.

FOR GPRS DATA CONNECTIONS ONLY:
1. Highlight the account you just created and press "Edit"
2. Select IP Address and enter the IP address for the gateway, "Save".

SET-UP E-MAIL:
Please contact your service provider or e-mail provider for the following settings:
- Incoming server address (POP3 server) and port · which identifies the computer where your incoming email messages are stored.
- Outgoing server address (SMTP server) and port· which identifies the computer through which your outgoing email messages are sent.
- Email address
- Email User name
- Email Password

1. [MESSAGES] > [EMAIL] > [SETTINGS]
2. Choose [NEW ACCOUNT], press "Add"
3. Enter a name for the email account, for example Home or Office, press "OK"
4. Choose [CONNECT USING]
5. Choose the data account that you created earlier to use with this email account
6. Choose [PROTOCOL] - POP 3 or IMAP 4. POP 3 is the most common.
7. Choose [INCOMING SERVER]. Enter the name or IP address of the service provider for incoming email messages.
8. Choose [INCOMING PORT]. If needed, change the port used by the protocol you are using.
9. Choose [ENCRYPTION] > [INCOMING SERVER] or [OUTGOING SERVER]; If you want encryption, you will be prompted for your domain.
10. Choose [MAILBOX]. Enter the username for your email account.
11. Choose [PASSWORD]. Enter a password for your email account. Your service provider will alternatively request a password on connection.
12. Choose [OUTGOING SERVER]. Enter the name or IP address of the SMTP server to be able to send email messages.
13. Choose [OUTGOING PORT]. If needed, change the port used by the SMTP protocol.
14. Choose [EMAIL ADDRESS]. Your Internet service provider supplies you with your email address.
15. Choose [DOWNLOAD]. Choose whether to receive [HEADERS & TEXT] or [HEADERS ONLY].
16. Choose [FROM NAME]. Enter your name. This will appear in outgoing email messages. This is not mandatory.
17. Choose [SIGNATURE]. Choose if you want to add a signature to your email messages. This is not mandatory.
18. Choose [COPY OUTGOING]. Choose [ON], if you want email messages sent from your phone to be sent to an additional email address of your choice. This way, your sent messages are copied and can be saved for future reference. This is not mandatory.
19. Choose [CHECK INTERVAL]. Choose how often you want the phone to connect to your email server and check for incoming email messages. This is not mandatory.

DEFAULT ACCOUNT:
If you have both an office and a home email account, you can set one of them as default.
1. [MESSAGES] > [EMAIL] > [SETTINGS]
2. Select the account that you want to use as default.

As part of Sony Ericsson's commitment to excellent customer service, we offer a wide variety of mobile products to suit your lifestyle. If you require more information, or have any other questions, please visit our website at http://www.sonyericsson.com or call us at 1-866-766-9374

Best regards,
Kim
Your Sony Ericsson Online Support Representative
Sony Ericsson Mobile Communications

So, I am baffled. Why build all these features into the phone and the service, if the product folks can't be bothered to make them work? If it is possible for some passionate amateur to get this to work, why doesn't Sony Ericsson, Cingular, or both, license his solution and/or his advice and make something that is installable, so that I could simply register for the service, and click 'ok' a few times?

Despite the fact that the phone has many good features, I am on the prowl again. Not for a better phone, per se, but one that balances features -- yes, I need the ability to record phone calls, and I will always want a good camera in my phone -- with product integration: I need the service and the phone features to actaully meet in the middle, not leave it up to me to hack it together. Either make it downloadable, or put it in the phone to begin with. I don't want to debug the phone, I just want it to do what's advertised. But I also lust for more fuctionality. I admit it. So here's my current wislist for the dream phone:

• 3Gish connectivity: I want to be able to connect to the web from my phone, both directly -- for IM, web browsing, email, or specialized apps -- or indirectly, as a modem for my Mac. And I would like it to be fast, please: as fast as possible.
• Camera - At least 1.5 M pixels, plus other features. Email photos, various lighting and special effect settings. A real lens system? The S710a has a light, which is cool and good for other purposes, too. I also like the video capability of the S701a, but its too time limited -- I really need at least 30 mins -- and the ability to use an external mic. Strangely, my phone supports speaker phone capabilities (necessary!) but no way to use that when videoing (or else it is always used, and there is no way to know).
Bluetooth -- Truly essential for syncing and connectivity. Don't want an additional cable so Bluetooth is critical, although I would be willing to accept a cable if it did other things, like USB charging of the phone, or firewire connectivity to camera/camcorder capabilities. Also, I would like my phone to be able to play nice with my Skype or other online VoIP accounts. So when the desktop VoIP tool 'rings' it would be directed to my cell phone, if I were in Bluetooth range. And, likevice, I would be able to call out on my cell phone, directed through the VoIP solution.
• Speaker phone - 'nuff said.
• Geopositioning -- Never have had it, but after using my wife's GPS unit, I want it. Also would like to have geolocation associated with metadata of other media: photo, video, and audio.
• PDA fetaures -- I make extensive use of the calendar and address book on my phone, in the obvious ways. I would like hyperlink there, so if I include a URL is an event, for example, I could click on it and open the phone browser pointing to a map, or a website, for example.
• iTunes -- Why the hell not? My phone is much bigger than a Nano, so it seems reasobably to only lug one gizmo around. Besides, I am not using the PDA extras on my iPod at all, so that's a waste. And now that there is a video iPod there will soon be a...
• Video iPod Phone -- All the above plus video. I like the idea of being able to not only watch video podcasts, or stream TV, but more importantly, to converse face-to-face through my phone with video just like I do through my Mac with iChat now. This is the killer feature: video phones at last!

I can dream, can't I?